At one with the peasants

I guess I got myself into this. While in Xi'an I knew that I wanted to get into the countryside. I read a small bit in a guidebook about "Waterfall Curtain Cave" at a place called Wushan. It was in the direction I was going and it sounded adventurous. I was up for it. I woke up this morning to catch the train.

"One ticket to Wushan please."
"No seat!"
"No problem"

I knew how it worked. It was one of those trains where the seats had no numbers. You just have to find a strategy to get a seat.

I lined up with the others at the gate. It was 20 minutes before the train was to depart and people were getting anxious. I was in the middle of a line about 500 people long. We all wanted the seat. People from the back began to push. There just wasn't anywhere to go.
And this is where I turned off myself, and turned into "Kyle Peasant".
Something clicked and I just went into the mode. I was being pushed from behind and I started to push the others ahead of me. I put my arms up and started elbowing anyone who came near me. The clock was ticking, the police were getting nervous. Finally the key man came. We all saw him.

Click

The door opened and the race was on. Like a tidal wave the people from behind thrust with all their might. I had to keep in the middle of the line or chanced getting caught behind some chairs. I pushed a mans suitcase in front of me to the left and successfully got it stuck between the chairs. I jumped past him stormed ahead. Once we got through the gate it was an all out sprint to the second platform. I bulldozed my way trhough the elderly. I ran diagonally down the stairs passing numerous people on the way. Finally I jumped onto the platform and ran for my carriage. This is where it happened. If you didn't get in fast enough you were standing up for 5 hours by a horrendous squat toilet. 10 people where trying to get into the door at the same time. I saw a small space and squeezed in. 5 people came behind me. I was face to face with men who hadn't brushed their teeth for....forever. The smell is similar throughout China. Its a mix between warm two-week old garbage and a red stinky tofu you get on the street side. They were breathing in my face. I held my breath and pushed one last time. I was on the train. I ran for a seat that looked occupied and demanded to know if it was available, the woman stuttered and I knew she just wanted it for herself.
"It's free!"
I threw my bag and sat down.
Success.
As Kyle came back the regret settled in. I know it's not right to push, shove, elbow, trip, and act like an animal.
It just seems when you get into these situations you fight or squat by a squat toilet.

I arrived at Wushan. I expected some sort of city.

I was wrong.

All there was was a road.
"Where's the Waterfall Curtain Cave?" I asked a friendly looking police officer.
"It's in Luomen"
"Oh, in my book it said its in Wushan."
"It is, in Luomen, Wushan."
"Oh, where are we now?"
"This is Wushan."
"Ahhh, ok, well where to I go?
" Go to Luomen Wushan, take the green bus it's 1 RMB"

So I jumped on the bus and went to Luomen Wushan. Stupid mistake.

Usually in these kind of places you get all sorts of people smiling and gawking at you, but here no one seemed to notice. I guessed that since this was on the Silk Road foreigners had been coming here for hundreds of years and they were used to it.

I was wrong.

As I gazed out the window I felt that feeling you feel when someone is looking at you. I looked back and everyone in the bus was looking at me. I knew I was in for it. I got off at the main square of a 3 street town. Everyone looked at me. As I walked the main dusty road looking for hotel everyone stared, some smiled, some nodded, some shouted, some giggled. After about 15 minutes I was sick of the fame. I found a hotel and went out to explore the place. Again, same stuff, people staring, yelling, laughing. To tell you the truth most Chinese small cities are exactly the same. A few dusty streets, a market, some cows, a few dirty buildings. I realized that all I was doing walking around was giving the locals a show. I sat down to eat some street food and was surrounded by 5 old people and a crazy guy with a lazy eye.
"You want an apple?" said the crazy guy with a lazy eye.
"No thanks."
The more I ate the more people came. The problem with these small places is that adults don't understand that I don't understand the local village dialect.
"Ni takala nali?" An old women with no teeth asked.
I supposed she was asking where I was from
"Jianada"
"ohhhhhhh, guonoda, guonoda,." The 5 people and crazy guy with a lazy eye said at the same time.
"You want an apple?" said the crazy guy with a lazy eye.
"No thanks."
So the old people continued talking about me while I had my 15 cent noodles. On they went until I was finished. Occasionally they would ask me questions but since I had no idea what they were saying I would just nod and smile.
I don't even know if they were speaking a language. It just sounded like gurgling sounds.
"Naoh cloak a boot, ga he!"
Nod and smile
"Waola rick mufsta, ga he!
Nod and smile

Finally I got up, paid and left. As I was walking away I heard a high-pitched scream.
I looked back to see the crazy guy with the lazy eye jumping up and down and waving an apple.
"You want an apppppple?"
"Fine."
I went back and took the apple.

And now I'm at an internet cafe with an apple.